Caturday!

from our friends at www.icanhascheezburger.com

Have a great Caturday, everyone!!!!!

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Caturday: Did somebody say "Vampires" ?

Willy Billy Button says "Happy Caturday" !!!!!

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Women's Rights: Jamie Leigh Jones

This woman has guts. She really does. She's taken a horrible experience and turned it into a blazing fight for justice. I look at her sweet little face and think, if I was her father, brother, husband, boyfriend? Some KBR employees would be sitting around wondering what happened to their gonads.

You know who else has guts? Our newest Senator, Al Franken. Watch him kick KBR's lawyer's ass nine ways to Sunday.

Minnesota, you did the right thing by giving us this wonderful guy. He comes to his committees and hearings PREPARED. He reads everything. And he's sharp as a tack.



Go, Senator Al!

Now I see why the Rethuglicans were so terrified of letting him into the Senate. He does not mealymouth around.

So, Minnesota, all y'all gotta do now is get rid of that batshit-crazy Bachmann and we're, like, on, yaknow?

Damn, he rocks. DiBernardo's going to take a week or two to dislodge that pointy boot from his ass. Serves him right too.

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Caturday!

from those wonderful folks at www.icanhascheezburger.com

Have a great day, everyone!!!

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Peace and Love is right, congratulations President Obama

All we are saying, is give peace a chance! On this day, John Lennon's birthday, I want to congratulate President Obama on winning the Nobel Peace Prize. I think it is well deserved and I hope this prize gives him even more encouragement and resolve to pursue policies that promote peace and not war. Yes, it is a dangerous world, a jungle out there, but I think he is trying to build relationships in the world and is pursuing diplomacy as a means to reduce tensions and solve problems. There is a lot of work to be done, we're not there yet and may never get there, but I hope this gives President Obama even more encouragement and resolve to do that.

And I know how this rankles the far right wing in this country, all the looney bin nuts. The assholes from hell. Real stinking smelly ones at that. I'm sure they are just livid at the thought of President Obama being successful and representing America as a shining light in the world in a way those war mongering bastards, like a neighbor from hell, never could. This is a point of pride for America and these assholes ought to get their heads screwed on straight and recognize it. But in the meantime, shut up your fucking pie holes and maybe we all will be rewarded with a world we can live in. Now that I got that out, I can go back to being peaceful. Congratulations President Obama!

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Meta: Announcement

Blogging light to nonexistent over the next few days, as this blogger hies off to parts nearby on a brief holiday, leaving Ms. Manitoba to hold down the fort.

See y'all in a few, comrades! (There's another word that won't make it into the New Conservative Bible being written right now by über-gay rightard John Schlafly.)

Stay safe and happy, y'awl! Back in a bit.

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Religion: It Makes You Craaaaaazy

Hahaha. Apparently, Phyllis Schlafly's ever-so-closeted QUEEN of a son has decided to invite help from fellow Conservapedians in rewriting the Wholly Babble. You know, to remove all that "liberal bias." Here's how they plan to go about it:

1. Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias

2. Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, "gender inclusive" language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity

3. Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level

4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop; defective translations use the word "comrade" three times as often as "volunteer"; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as "word", "peace", and "miracle".

5. Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as "gamble" rather than "cast lots"; using modern political terms, such as "register" rather than "enroll" for the census

6. Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.

7. Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning

8. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story

9. Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels

10. Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities; prefer concise, consistent use of the word "Lord" rather than "Jehovah" or "Yahweh" or "Lord God."

Truly. You can't make this shit up. These denizens of rightwingnuttia are determined, I tellya, de-fucking-termined to write all that socialist, communist, love-yer-brother shit right out of teh Holy Book. So, John Schlafly — are you going to take someone's dick out of your mouth long enough to edit out all teh gay-h8ing crap? Or are you going to be a weenie in every sense of the word and leave it all in?

Republican Jesus courtesy of RepublicanDirtyTricks, which you should only read right now

Of course, because logic is not their strong point, they don't seem to have realized (will they ever?) that by rewriting the supposedly Inerrant Word of Gawd, they're proving that, far from being inerrant, it is simply the work of man, who changes it to suit his sentiments of the moment. This is called being hoist by one's own petard. And although Wikipedia insists that a petard is a small bomb that could blow up and injure the party using it on others, I prefer to believe, in keeping with the root word, pet, which is French for fart, that these moral midgets run the risk of blowing themselves up to the M-o-o-o-o-n with their own farts.

Because that's what this project represents: pseudo-intellectual farts in a strong wind, which have a definite likelihood of blowing right back up the arsehole of those who delivereth them and propelling them on to, as it were, greater heights.

I can't wait to see what the churches and the religious right, the last bastion of ReapUglyCon support, have to say about this. Methinks it ain't gonna be good.

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Entertainment: Too Funny!

From friend and fellow-blogger Nunya, over at PolitickyBitch:



Because she knows how to make a Cat laugh!

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Caturday!

ICHC FTW!

Happy Caturday, everyone! Celebrate wiv Baysment Cat! Even Baysment Cat takes Caturday off from the all-important task of harvesting souls.

On the home front, the felinoids (we call them felinoids because they always feel annoyed, no matter what you're doing) are welcoming the fall with sleeping, sleeping, and still more sleeping. Interspersed with a little ass-biting. Madu has eased up on his rodent extermination duties thanks to the presence of some hooty owls which appear to be nesting in a nearby tree. They're new to the area, or at least new of late. The first time we heard one, we thought someone was coughing.

Madu and Gojira NOT fighting for a change

In the event, they seem to be keeping the nasty little pocket gophers away, which delights the plants, no doubt.

We're hiking tomorrow, a four-mile hike, possibly, along a relatively easy trail. Slight elevations, a little scree, nothing too rugged.

Although we have our eye on a guided hike to the top of Mount Kilimanjaro for 2011. Slowly by slowly, as my people say.

Do cats suffer from sleep apnea? Two of the fattest in the Home Tribe are snoring so loudly these days, it's enough to wake a body from a sound sleep. Or deep sleep, anyway.

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Happy Anniversary, Mr. President and First Lady!

President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama

It is the anniversary of the President and his lovely First Lady, and they celebrated with a quiet dinner. What a joy this lovely couple is!

Happy anniversary to you both. May your marriage flourish and bring you, your children, and your nation joy for many more years.

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Announcement: Parks and Photos

Beautiful photos of a beautiful park over at the sisterblog.

Also, art, in American Prayer Flags. If you know of a gallery interested in hosting this exhibit, let us know.

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Politics: Incitement to Violence

ICHC FTLOL

The Foofaraw-Of-The-Day (hereinafter FoTD) was that some motherfucking idiot butthole surfer decided to create a poll asking whether his fellow FaceBookers thought that President Obama deserved assassination.

For those who don't use FaceBook, lots and lots of third-party developers write little apps that you can use to do silly stuff on FB, like create stupid polls that actually go to your FB account and pull all kinds of data about you and your friends and then sell it to people who want to pay money to find out what kind of people use FB and how dumb they are and also how likely to pay money for the dumb things these people want to sell them.

So there's this third-party app that lets you create polls. And most of the polls are really silly, harmless stuff like "What flavour of ice-cream are you?" and "Do you wear frilly panties?" and shit like that.

Well, this bright soul (not) decides to create this fucking poll about whether the President should be assassinated, and the choices it gives you are (Yes), (Maybe), (If he cuts my healthcare), and (No).

Some 700 or so other idiots found this poll and decided to take it. Well, actually, the first person to take it probably sent it to five other friends, who sent it to 25 other friends, and it snowballed. To the credit of most of the idiots who took it, the answer was NO by a staggering margin. And the total number of responses was very small in terms of the total number of users on FB. And, the Internets responded by reporting the dumb motherfucker to the Secret Service.

To FB's credit, they immediately suspended polls when this was brought to their attention. They then had a little talk with the app developer, asking him to fix his code so that no one could ever do such a revoltingly swinish thing again. Which he is, I believe, doing as we squeak. They also had their little session with the Secret Service and, no doubt, have turned over captured IP addresses and the like.

Welp. It won't be too long before the Men In Black have a little conversation with the feckin' eejit who wrote that feckin' poll, will it, now?



Good luck, you scum-sucking swine. You're going to need all of it that you can get. Not that we think you should be allowed much of anything, with the exception of bread, water, and shelter from the elements in a jail cell for some years, but hey. You get your day in court while the prosecutor tries to prove you guilty.

Maybe this will stop the likes of Annhole Coulter, Glen Blech, and Flush Rimbowl from making their unacceptable and unwarranted cracks about poisoning Supreme Court Justices, or the Speaker of the House, or shooting at the Speaker or the President.

Listen up, Fuckwits, one and all: US Code TITLE 18 PART I CHAPTER 115 § 2385:

Whoever knowingly or willfully advocates, abets, advises, or teaches the duty, necessity, desirability, or propriety of overthrowing or destroying the government of the United States or the government of any State, Territory, District or Possession thereof, or the government of any political subdivision therein, by force or violence, or by the assassination of any officer of any such government; or
Whoever, with intent to cause the overthrow or destruction of any such government, prints, publishes, edits, issues, circulates, sells, distributes, or publicly displays any written or printed matter advocating, advising, or teaching the duty, necessity, desirability, or propriety of overthrowing or destroying any government in the United States by force or violence, or attempts to do so; or
Whoever organizes or helps or attempts to organize any society, group, or assembly of persons who teach, advocate, or encourage the overthrow or destruction of any such government by force or violence; or becomes or is a member of, or affiliates with, any such society, group, or assembly of persons, knowing the purposes thereof—
Shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than twenty years, or both, and shall be ineligible for employment by the United States or any department or agency thereof, for the five years next following his conviction.
If two or more persons conspire to commit any offense named in this section, each shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than twenty years, or both, and shall be ineligible for employment by the United States or any department or agency thereof, for the five years next following his conviction.
As used in this section, the terms “organizes” and “organize”, with respect to any society, group, or assembly of persons, include the recruiting of new members, the forming of new units, and the regrouping or expansion of existing clubs, classes, and other units of such society, group, or assembly of persons.

So before you form into astroturfer organizations carrying placards advocating the violent overthrow of the government, please note that it is a fucking CRIME as defined by law. There are penalties for this kind of hate speech. You can't run around flapping your ugly gobs about killing people without consequences.

Do you understand, you cone-headed dimwits? The Free Speech amendment to the Constitution gives you the right PEACEABLY to assemble. Read it, idiots:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

If you're not assembling PEACEABLY, without guns or hate speech or threats or incitements to crime, well, there are consequences for that kind of behaviour. You have to take responsibility for your bullshit, assholes. Better start sending money to the ACLU now, motherfuckers, because they're the only ones that will bail your oversized useless lardy asses out of the hoosegow.

Moreover, these heah threats you're making against your freely and fairly elected President? That shit is laid out in the same fucking code, you worthless buttfucks. Read it and meep: TITLE 18 PART I CHAPTER 41 § 871.

Threats against President and successors to the Presidency

(a) Whoever knowingly and willfully deposits for conveyance in the mail or for a delivery from any post office or by any letter carrier any letter, paper, writing, print, missive, or document containing any threat to take the life of, to kidnap, or to inflict bodily harm upon the President of the United States, the President-elect, the Vice President or other officer next in the order of succession to the office of President of the United States, or the Vice President-elect, or knowingly and willfully otherwise makes any such threat against the President, President-elect, Vice President or other officer next in the order of succession to the office of President, or Vice President-elect, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than five years, or both.
(b) The terms “President-elect” and “Vice President-elect” as used in this section shall mean such persons as are the apparent successful candidates for the offices of President and Vice President, respectively, as ascertained from the results of the general elections held to determine the electors of President and Vice President in accordance with title 3, United States Code, sections 1 and 2. The phrase “other officer next in the order of succession to the office of President” as used in this section shall mean the person next in the order of succession to act as President in accordance with title 3, United States Code, sections 19 and 20.

OK, assholes? Didja get that? Do you understand the words of more than one syllable here? The next time one of you motherfuckers starts making that cocksucking pout of the lips and spouting off about the tree of liberty being watered with the blood of tyrants? Y'awl better be prepared to see some Men In Black coming through the front door, the back door, or both.

What part of PEACEABLY TO ASSEMBLE do you pointy-headed assholes not get? "Peaceably to assemble" does not mean "bring your fucking Uzis and AK-47s to the town hall and terrify little children and old ladies," do you get that yet?



Because by all you fucking hold holy, you brainless walking excrement, if you harm one hair on the head of our lawfully elected President, our Vice-President, or our Speaker of the House, be prepared for some real patriots to kick the holy fucking shit out of your cheetos-laden ass.

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Health Care: What YOU Can Do

If you've been following the Health Care Reform fight, then you know that the Senate Finance Committee met today to vote on Max Baucus' bill.

Well, five Blue Running Dogs joined the Republicans to vote against the public option authored by Senator Rockefeller (D-W.Va). This, despite the fact that two out of every three of their constituents (or more) FAVOUR a Public Option. And despite the fact that the CBO (Congressional Budget Office) has already published a report stating that Rockefeller's version of the public option would save the government between $50 billion and $150 billion over a ten-year period.

Needless to say, ALL the Republicans voted against the Public Option. So down it went in flames.

The time has come to fight back, people. Get off your duffs. A commenter at HuffPo left the following information on who to contact, and how:

BAUCUS: Phone: (202) 224-2651 Fax: (202) 224-9412
LINCOLN: Phone: (202) 224-4843 Fax: (202) 228-1371
CONRAD: Phone: (202) 224-2043 Fax: (202) 224-7776
NELSON: Phone: (202) 224-5274 Fax: (202) 228-2183
CARPER: Phone: (202) 224-2441 Fax: (202) 228-2190

If you are a constituent of any of these primo assholes, then it is your DUTY to call or fax them and demand to know why they have rejected Rockefeller's money-saving public option. They're now debating Chuck Schumer's version of the public option, a much weaker, watered-down version which won't save the country as much, if anything.

Any constituents of Charles Grassley out there? If you believe you deserve as good health care as he gets thanks to your taxes, call or fax him too, and ask him why he made this statement:

"Government is not a competitor. Government is a predator."

— Sen. Charles Grassley (R-Iowa).

Does he really mean it? Has he given up HIS taxpayer-financed health care? Who is his private health care insurer? Why does he not switch over to private health care? If they're good enough for us, they should be good enough for him.

ICHC FTLOL

Give them all an earful, peeps. They deserve it. They've earned it.

Note: This blog does not advocate violence against anyone. However, we reserve the right to mercilessly mock our so-called elected representatives.

Additional note: Although it would be great if the people's representatives could be spayed or neutered, it is, unfortunately, too late, as most of them have already flung their obviously unworthy genes into the pool.

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